


Tiger, Tiger

by alynwa



Series: Picfic Tuesday Challenge [34]
Category: The Man From U.N.C.L.E.
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-04
Updated: 2013-06-04
Packaged: 2017-12-13 23:49:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,413
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/830259
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alynwa/pseuds/alynwa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Illya has a problem.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tiger, Tiger

“Mr. Solo, this is most unusual!  Where are we even to keep this beast?”  Mr. Waverly was sitting at his desk puffing on his pipe keeping a wary eye on the Siberian tiger who had leapt up and made itself comfortable on his conference table. At the sound of the Old Man’s voice, it _chuffed_ and stretched out to its full length, practically covering the diameter of the table.

“I admit, Sir, it wasn’t easy ah, sneaking him into the building.  I stuck him in the back of a van and drove into the underground garage and then used your private elevator to reach your office.”

“So, no one has seen him?”

“Only Miss Rogers.”

Mr. Waverly pushed his intercom button and said, “Miss Rogers, kindly have Dr. Jameson report to my office immediately.  Thank you.”

A few minutes later, UNCLE’s Chief of Medicine appeared in the doorway.  “Mother of God!” he screamed at the sight of the large animal eyeing him somewhat hostilely, “What is _that?_ ”

“ _That,_ ” Napoleon said calmly, “is my partner.”

Uncomprehending, Dr. Jameson asked, “He ate Illya?”

The CEA shook his head _No._ “He _is_ Illya.  The scientist in the satrap we uncovered in Idaho was a huge fan of the story ‘The Island of Doctor Moreau’ and had been working on formulas to turn people into animals or half – animals.  Illya was captured and by the time I was able to free him, he had been injected twice with the formula and was turning into…what you see before you.”

Doctor Jameson ventured a little farther into the room.  “Are you _sure_ it’s him?”

Napoleon’s face, for a moment, showed strong emotions that he quickly clamped down, but not before the tiger saw it.  He stood and turned to face Napoleon and then leaned in and head – bumped the American who, in turn, ruffled the fur around the big cat’s neck.  “When I broke through into Illya’s cell, he was…transforming.  It was painful for him and ah… _very_ hard to watch.  Before he changed completely, he was able to tell me that…he ah, he wouldn’t forget me and he would never hurt me.”  He looked away for a moment to compose himself.  “Luckily, I was able to capture the scientist and bring him in for debriefing.”

Mr. Waverly spoke up, “Under the influence of the truth serum Veritol 19, he told us that without regular injections, Mr. Kuryakin should return to his human form approximately twenty – four hours after his last injection which was twenty hours ago.  Unfortunately, he was unable to tell us if he will experience any permanent damage; Mr. Kuryakin was his first human guinea pig.”

“Dr. Jameson, you and Mr. Solo will use my elevator to take Mr. Kuryakin to the Quarantine Section where he will remain until such time as he transforms back and then you, Doctor, will examine him.”

Illya snuffled and rubbed his head against Napoleon.  “Ah, Mr. Waverly, Illya hasn’t eaten…”

“Understood.”  He pressed his intercom button again.  “Miss Rogers, please order several boxes of chickens and steaks to be delivered to Medical.”  He looked at the two men and the tiger in front of him.  “I certainly hope this is a temporary condition; Mr. Kuryakin has a prodigious appetite as a human being.  I shudder to think how much it will cost to keep him full as a tiger.”    

Napoleon and Illya settled into Quarantine as much as they could.  They had the entire section to themselves; Napoleon told Dr. Jameson he would call him when he was needed.  Napoleon turned one room into what amounted to a giant litter box so that his partner could have privacy and they ate in another room.  The boxes of meat had been brought to the section’s entrance by hand truck along with a hero and a soda for Napoleon and left just outside.  Napoleon brought them into a room and opened a box of chickens.  “Tovarisch, do you want me to take them out for you?”

Illya marched over and leaned on the man to move him out of the way.  He reached in with his mouth and pulled out a chicken.  Two bites and it was gone.  Napoleon watched the huge cat plow single-mindedly through the box of food until there was nothing left.  Licking his lips, Illya sat down and stared at the brunet.

Napoleon finished his meal and stared back.  “Illya, I know you’re still hungry and there is more food here for you, but listen to me: According to that nutty scientist, you should begin changing back in like, three hours.  I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to fill up your tiger belly.”  In response to the growling that began to rumble from the cat, Napoleon said, “Be reasonable, Illya.  I think it would be dangerous to change with that much food in you.  I think an empty or almost empty stomach might make the transition easier.  I certainly hope this transition will be easier on you than before.  I have to tell you, my heart was breaking listening to you scream as your bones and muscles stretched and rearranged themselves.  I’m sorry you can’t be sedated or given pain killers.  Who knows how they would interact with the drugs in your system now?”  He leaned forward and put his face in his hands.  After a few seconds, he heard a low sound as Illya rubbed his head against his arm.  “You’re purring.  Trying to make me feel better, Partner Mine?”  He stood and went to the bed and pulled the sheets and blankets off it and began to spread them on the floor while the tiger sat and watched curiously.

“You can’t fit on the bed, Illya, and I’m not letting you sleep on the floor alone while I do, so…”  He grabbed the pillow and let it drop.  As he leaned over and turned off the lights he said, “Lie down, Poosey – Cat, let’s get some shuteye.”   He laid down as the tiger walked around in a tight circle before finally lying down beside Napoleon.  “Illya, I promise you, if you don’t change back, I will take care of you.  Don’t worry.”  The purring of the large feline helped him drift off to sleep.

Napoleon awoke and for a moment, wasn’t sure where he was.  He glanced at his watch.  _Eleven – twenty?  I didn’t hear anything.  Illya!_ He turned his head to see that he was lying next to a very naked, very _human_ partner.  “Illya?  Illya, can you hear me?  Wake up,” he called softly.  He was loathe to touch the man in case he was in pain.

The blond stretched his arms over his head and arched his entire body as he yawned widely and then sat up to look down silently at Napoleon. 

“Illya?” Napoleon said as he also sat up and moved into a cross – legged position, “How do you feel?  Can you speak?”

“ _Da_ , I can.  Apparently, I transitioned painlessly in my sleep.”  He stood and wrapped the sheet Napoleon handed him around his body.  “It was terrifying when I began to turn into an animal.  After I told you I would not hurt you, I could not speak anymore, but I could understand.  Thank you, Napoleon for vowing to take care of me.  I believed you.  Before you call Dr. Jameson, do me a favor?  Could you please get my bag from our office so I may get dressed?”

“Sure, Partner, but I better let Mr. Waverly know now that you’re back to human.”  He used the phone in the room.  “He’s back, Sir.  Yes, yes.  I’ll be calling the doctor in a few minutes; I wanted to let you know first.  He seems fine, I’m sure he’s fine.  I will do that, I will tell him.  Goodnight, Mr. Waverly.”

Illya spoke up.  “ _What_ will you tell me?”

Napoleon smiled.  “He said to welcome you back and that those cases of chickens and steaks are no longer yours and are to be delivered to the Commissary.”

The Russian laughed, “I should have known!  Go, Napoleon.  The sooner I get dressed, the sooner I can be examined and the sooner I can get out of here.”

“Fine, I’m going.”  He began to walk out, but stopped suddenly.  “It occurs to me, Illya, that you really _are_ my big, strong Poosey – Cat!” 

The pillow hit him squarely in the middle of his back as he ran.     


End file.
